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Out of the Closet, How to Grow Your Own

Out of the Closet
How to Grow Your Own

For Entertainment Purposes Only (duh)

The month of February saw 5 new victims of the drug war in Santa Cruz, young and greedy pot enthusiasts who crowded a few too many medical marijuana licenses in one house. They would have been fine; they had way less than the legal limit. What busted them was the proliferation of cash and scales. The Sentinel reported that law enforcement throughout California are now trying to "weed out" those exploiting medical marijuana for "dealing" instead of "healing."
The truth is, law enforcement, cannabis clubs, and vigilante drug dealers all have one thing in common: they don't want you to know how easy it is to grow your own. Even if you have just a closet to spare, a small initial investment and a bit of TLC will do wonders to keep you and yours in weed and you can say goodbye to greedy and shady providers forever.

Technically, all you need is a secluded grow space and some seeds. Marijuana is a weed and grows resiliently. Even just a bit of water and sun will give you something, even if it is just a joint or two. If you want to encourage a high yield and strong potency, the smallest grow space you want to use is about 2x3x5 feet, roughly the size of one of the large coat closets that come in a typical dorm room. That gives them enough room to grow without getting burnt by your lights. From there, you just need a simple set of tools.

The most important tool is good lighting. When your seeds sprout, you want to supply them with as many florescent lights as you can, ideally a few hundred watts. These will stay on all day (24 hours a day, 7 days a week). After 4 to 6 weeks, or when your plant has grown to a foot or two, your are going to switch to day and night cycles (photo periods). The photo period that prompts marijuana to flower the fastest is twelve hours of light, and twelve hours of dark. It is very important that no light shines on the plants at all during their dark period, not even for a second. It will shock the plant and take two weeks for it to start producing again.

At this point, you will need to invest in high-pressure sodium lights for the light period of the day in your garden. These are available at the Grow King store on Mission street, but can also be scavenged from parking lots and college campuses. You will notice a glass tube connected to two metal ends, (the gaseous filament) encased within a larger glass casing, (the bulb) and they produce a soft orange glow. When stealing these lights, know that they require a ballast to operate off a normal light switch. Some, (like the brown square sidewalk lamps that are all around the west side of campus) have built in ballasts. Some do not and will require electrical work to apply to closet purposes. Steps for making a ballast are on the Internet. Do not use halogen lights. This is a common mistake and they will not help your plants at all. Fluorescent bulbs, while working well for the vegetative cycle of growth (when they are under 24 hour light) do not give off enough light to make an efficient source for flowering. When it comes time to flower your little plants, at least 250- 400 watts of high output lighting is pretty much a necessity for good bud.

The other necessary item is good soil. Use Fox Farms brand. Good soil, like Fox Farms, is loaded with fish emulsion (a fun fact to know when a vegetarian starts mooching all your weed). Fox Farms is available at the Ace's in Ben Lomond, up Highway 9. Pay in cash.

Weed eats a lot of nutrients, so even with Fox Farms good organic fertilizers are necessary. When the plants are under 24 hours of light, a fertilizer heavy in nitrogen helps with root and stalk development. When they are flowering (12-12 lighting), it is important to supply the plant with mostly sodium and potassium rich fertilizers, and restrict nitrogen, which inhibits flowering. Most fertilizers have three numbers at the base of their containers. The first is nitrogen, the second and third are potassium and sodium.

After you have these basics, you need to narc-proof your room. Use a primary wall of black garbage bag, then layers of sheets to sight proof the inside of your closet. To mask the smell, keep a supply of plug-ins and incense. You can also try placing a cup of water in your grow space that holds a mixture of yeast and sugar. This will produce a musky, neutral smell while also providing much needed CO2 to your plants.

Under 12-12 lighting it should only take 8 to 12 weeks to flower a plant. Marijuana is an annual plant. This means that you will only get to harvest your plant once (not that it takes a year to grow), so if you want to keep it up, you need to clone your plant once it starts growing. This is much easier than growing one after another, so once your first one is healthy, you have done the bulk of the work needed to keep up an ongoing supply of mind-alteration, self-medication, social lubrication, rope, or whatever it is you use this wonderful plant for.

This article is not meant as a grower's guide by any means. This is just an inventory and items and some useful, tried-and-true pointers to encourage you to disassociate from the buying and selling process and help you become a self-sufficient individual. If you're serious about growing, you're going to need to buy the Marijuana Grower's Insider's Guide or another comprehensive grow guide available at Glass Roots, by the clock tower on Pacific Ave. These books are packed with useful info about growing, cloning, care, and even many useful hydro tips that just aren't on the Internet. A guide is the final necessity for any grower attempting something new or clever.

The only two other things I can think to add are remember are:

1) Fuck Medical Marijuana. Did you see the X-Men? Remember the Mutant Registration Act? Even if it seems to be in our interest, you are still volunteering to be on a government list of known producers of illegal substances. Remember that California is okay with this (for now), but the Federal Government still very much isn't.

2) Loose lips send you to fucking jail. Maintain a security culture. Don't brag about your hobby. Only tell the people you know won't tell anyone else, if them. It can be hard to keep a such an awesome, superhero-style secret when someone's complimenting your smoke, but you get by with the phrase, "Thanks, my friend grows it." It's kind of the equivalent to saying, "For entertainment purposes only."

2-3 week old plants growing in a nearby dorm room


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Re: Out of the Closet, How to Grow Your Own

Well done!

Re: Out of the Closet, How to Grow Your Own

what the celius when plants are one week old?

Re: Out of the Closet, How to Grow Your Own

is it ok if i only have two flor lamps over one plant that is like two weeks old?


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